Christmas Island the New Jerusalem

DH is not usually given to doling out advice on foreign policy, but since her inbox is overflowing with invective from the Leftist Republic of CloudCuckooLand and their benighted Messianic opponents, she feels she is rapidly become as expert as the next punter. Having weighed up the polemic from both extremes,  the idea of the Middle Path so appeals to her that this may be her last missive before converting to Buddhism.

 

As a suitably detached neo-Buddhist Sage-in-Waiting and Equal of Heaven, then, here's her take on the Middle East conflict.  

 

Posing as mild-mannered welfare-workers come to straighten out the corrupt Palestinian Authority, Hamas' mustachios-with-fists got themselves elected by the desperate Gazan mainstream. While carrying on their welfare shopfront as a smokescreen, they prosecuted their real agenda. Holy War against the Infidel in their midst. 

 

What have they got to lose by taking 1000's of potshots at Southern Israel? Either the Israeli people living there give up, or else the testosterone crowd that tends to run governments and military, eventually succumb to doing what comes naturally and go ballistic.

 

DH wonders what Hamas cares if their people die? They believe in a glorious afterlife after all They've turned the whole state of Gaza into a suicide bomb. And they've got their allies in the Republic of CuckooLand backing them up in the propaganda war.

 

Poor Palestinians. Poor Israelis.

 

DH suggests a prisoner exchange. Lets round up all the fundamentalists, Jewish, Christian, Moslems, Socialist Alliance, and anyone else caught wearing silly hats. Then let's exchange them for all the normal co-operative flexible people stuck in the middle east who just want to get on with their lives.

 

Christmas Island. With all its facilities ready to go,  wouldn't that be a magnanimous and aptly named gift to the flotsam of Zion. Anyone for the New Jerusalem?

 

 

 

On the 15th day of Christmas...

And they wonder why DH gets desperate at this time of year! The list below is for real! It's exactly what DH's dear old mum gave her, although the numbers are somewhat under-stated.

With genes like this running through the family, what lifechances did DH ever have?

On the 15th day of Christmas, her mother gave to her

15 Anxious phone calls
14 Full of griping
13 Crochet doilies
12 Knit clothes hangers
11 Shirley Temple photos
10 Andre Rieu CDs
9 Old "Women's Weeklies"
8 Gold lamé jackets
7 Leftover sandwiches in
6 Layers of gift wrap
5 Oven Mitts!
14 Christmas cards
13 Channukah cards
12 Old underpants
. . . and a monologue on family history

Thank Kevin's Angels for the bonus

Despite the rational argument that the money would have been better spent on more housing, DH is deeply grateful for the $1400 that her daughter received as a Disability Pensioner.

 

It means that the two of us can afford to have a holiday for the first time in years. We plan to hire a car, and head down to the South Coast.

 

Can't wait to do our patriotic duty to bail out the nation's tourism industry!  So before we tootle off,

 

 

We wish you all a d&m 2009, dear readers!  

 

 

PS. Can't resist one final carp, before we hit the road.

Unfortunately, with the cost of car hire, petrol, and accommodation, their won't be enough left over to indulge any secret inclination DH's daughter may have for booze or gambling, so Tony Abbott should not worry too much. Do he and his cronies have any idea how people actually live??