Thursday, October 12, 2006

Quick! Hide the plasma TV! Vinnies pays a visit.

Just kidding. Of course DH doesnt own a plasma TV. But she feels as guilty as if she did. She doesn't look as poor as she is, and you would never guess from a first look at her place that she doesnt own a single item of furniture worth more than $60. The TV is eight years old, and the last time she bought a HiFi was in 1976. But it's amazing what you can do with 2 brightly coloured cushions, and a little Lack, Billy, and Klackbo. (And if you dont know what she's talkin' bout, you're clearly a traitor to Western values).
Why does she feel guilty? Well, she feels so sorry for the poor volunteers of St Vincents who are  being shamelessly exploited by the 3 Scrooges, Howard, Abbott and Costello, These poor people,  in their naivete. imagine that by giving up their precious hours after work, taking time away from their families, and wasting petrol to drive over with some electricity vouchers,  they are doing Christlike service for the poor, when in fact their main service is to make Costello look good on budget night, by doing for free what the Commonwealth Employment Service once did for award pay.
And in turn, people like DH have to play their part, and look suitably miserable, humble, contrite, and grateful.
Once the unemployed had rights. THeir benefits were enough to cover the utilities. Now they must beg.  They know the vouchers are out there, but they must needs open their homes to all comers for the privilege of getting a $30 voucher. (Actually come to think of it electricity is a State matter. You mean, Labor set up this appalling arrangement with the churches???)  
Well, DH;s place looks good and cheerful, and she wouldnt be caught dead in grubby trackie-daks. So she found herself feeling she had to do something to make her visitors feel the trip was worth the effort. And before you knew it, she was whining and carrying on as if she was in the confessional booth, forgive me father, for I spent $12 on the cushions, but the keyboard is not mine, and anyway its broken, and dont be fooled by the speakers, I picked them up at cleanup day, and and and
BTW for the benefit of the downwardly envious, DH does have some part-time work. But most of it will go in Govt clawbacks, and as for the Dept of Housing, she's afraid they'll go into fibrillations when they have to work out her new rent based on a variable hour casual short term contract.

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